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There's A Picture​.​.​.

from The Aristocrat by Eric Schwartz

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lyrics

How can you stand there, with baby blue eyes
And tell me you love me while tellin' me lies
I don't know where you were but you weren't alone
'Cuz there's a picture of somebody's dick on your phone

You almost pulled the wool over
I gotta hand it to you
It looks like your new guy is a straight shooter too.
You're a dirty old dog with a bad little bone
Cuz there's a picture of somebody's dick on your phone

You went straight for the shower
But you forgot one small thing
You put it right on the nightstand
And it preceded to ring
So i took a gander, and what did I see
One hell of a hammer starin back at me

So nevermind dinner
My crap's in the car
I took the stash from the Freezer
And the cash from the jar
One little thing before i say my goodbye.
There's tits on my Iphone to make both of us cry.

So call me sometime
And fuck yourself at the tone
Cuz there's a picture of somebody's dick on your phone.

credits

from The Aristocrat, released August 7, 2013
Marty Rifkin - Pedal Steel Guitar, Dobro
Neale Eckstein - Acoustic Arpeggio
David Buskin and Robin Batteau - Backing Vocals - Recorded at Fox Run Studio, Sudbury, MA
Wes Parker - High Lonesome Backing Vocals
Eric Holden- Bass
Craig Macintyre - Drums
ES - Gtr, Vox, Piano

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Eric Schwartz Los Angeles, California

Eric Schwartz might very well be the only artist in history to get raves from Gloria Steinem and Hustler magazine. Starting out in the folk music scene, Schwartz found that his favorite shows were the one where at least four people walked out. On the comedy scene, he's performed at the Improv, The Laugh Factory, the Comedy Store, on Howard Stern's 100, on All Things Considered. ... more

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